Tuesday, September 29, 2009
The Brick Wall
Ever feel like you're just banging your head against a brick wall?
Come on, be honest.
I feel like this all the time, and I hate it. It's so hard to keep writing when the results are a constant disappointment. I have days, weeks, even months, where I question why I'm doing this if it's going nowhere. Am I really on the path God has for me?
Ever feel that way?
Over at CBA-Ramblings today, Rachelle's talking about needing patience in the publishing industry. I read the comments with great interest. Wanted to smack a few people, truth be told.
I'm NOT a patient person.
I have had to wait for many things in my life, some very personal things that I really, really wanted, but knew there was nothing in my power I could do to get it. I had no choice then but to hand the entire situation over to God.
And guess what?
He came through. Big time.
I know that. I believe it, and I know that I have to trust that if this whole writing thing is really what I'm supposed to be doing, He'll confirm it.
I'm just not clear on how to get through this middle part, you know? The part where you're doing everything you can to improve, learn and grow, but it feels like you're just treading water. There's that really cool island in the distance, you're close enough to see the palm trees and the people partying it up on the beach, you can even smell the burgers. If you close your eyes you can taste that pina colada. Oh, it's gonna be good.
But you can't quite get there.
So help me out here, folks. What am I doing wrong? Why does this whole patience thing stump me like a calculus exam?